"Who Am I Becoming?"
"But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!"
Galatians 5:22-23 (NLT)
Dragging my feet and my heart, I headed to her room, finding her buried in her schoolbooks. She was responsible; I hadn’t been.
Welling up with tears, I began my apology. Seems like I’d been doing that a lot lately. This time I had failed to order my daughter’s graduation announcements.
What kind of mom am I?
My girl smiles as I blubber my confession. She reassures me: this is not an emergency. Tilting her head, she looks at me as if I’m from another planet. Not because I forgot, but because I’m crying. Who is this woman? I imagine her asking in her thoughts.
I know she must wonder about me these days.
Lately, I haven’t been recognizing myself either. The normally organized, rational, on-task woman can’t seem to keep it all together.
Maybe the forgetting isn’t so unintentional. Could this be my heart’s way of trying to put off the inevitable?
On my desk sits the form, the one I’ve procrastinated completing, requiring me to admit her age. She’s an adult now. How did that happen? My mind wonders, Will she still need me? Who am I now? What is my place? Change is hard.
I’m guessing that like me, you’ve either just come out of a season of change, are entering a season of change or it’s just on the horizon. It might not be your youngest graduating from high school. You might be returning to school, making a move or looking for a new job.
Change has a way of swirling in and around our lives. Just when we adjust, like a squirming toddler, life refuses to stay still. We finally think we’ve gotten control, when chaos erupts again. One activity stops while two are added. And whether we like the new that’s come, or wish we could run and hide, our feelings don’t change the inevitable.
Facing another change, and handling it well, requires a woman of character. Change requires traits I feel like I haven’t fully mastered and so I tend to think, I’m just not patient. I can’t be kind.
But maybe, just maybe, times of transition are God’s way of bringing the change. He just might be setting up this opportunity for me to grow into the woman He knows I can become.
I’m learning I can allow the pressure of transition to transform me. I can permit the rain and the sunshine in my life to grow His fruit in me … the kind described in today’s key verse from Galatians 5: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Every day we are becoming something different. The question is, Who are we becoming? During the planting, watering and weeding of change, if we will be diligent and faithful during each season, we’ll see beauty grow in our lives.
As we lean into God, asking for strength through the peace or through the pain, He will make us into the women He’s intended for us to become: Women becoming God’s definition of beautiful.
Dear Jesus, I don’t always like the change that comes in my life, but I do want to be beautiful instead of bitter. Grow in me the traits You call gorgeous and help me to embrace this season. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
TRUTH FOR TODAY:
Galatians 5:24-25, "Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit." (NIV)
Romans 8:5, "Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit." (NLT)